Is this helping? To be constantly looking over your shoulder because someone is going to catch you f*cking up again?
Like a sniper is watching and judging your every move?
To be weighed down by the demand for no mistakes, only excellence?
I've had enough of this bullshit.
We might have learned it from our merciless father. We might have learned it from our cruel mother. Or we might find ourselves caught in the crosshairs of a violent shootout of negative projections in society.
But at the end of the day we do it to ourselves. We take what we learned from others and do it 100x worse to ourselves.
And then we do it to others and around the wheel it goes.
It's okay to f*ck up.
You're in the goddamn process of learning.
You didn't exit the womb with a receipt for a guarantee of perfection.
You didn't come out of the womb ready to hit the ground running. It was a process.
It still is a process.
Maybe you're a man who has asked women out and failed miserably. I get the feeling, brother. But guess what? You tried. And you get to f*ck up, learn, and try again.
Maybe you're a woman who is trying to be more open and receptive, but you come across as stiff and awkward and the men don't respond favorably. Guess what? You are trying something you've never done before. You get to f*ck up, forgive yourself, and keep going.
Growth, joy, and creativity flourish in the presence of encouragement.
Encouragement allows room for mistakes AND it believes in your potential.
Encouragement says, "I f*cked up. I f*cked up again! I don't feel like trying anymore. But this is a very human experience. And I will be ready to try again. Not because I have to, but because I want to. I believe in something greater for myself; I'm just not there yet. I'm in process."
You and I are not that different.
We have both f*cked up. And we are both students of life. We are learning.
The rate does not matter. We learn and grow at different rates. My snake plants did not grow as fast as my green onions, yet I appreciate their beauty all the same.
My way won't be exactly your way. Your way won't exactly be my way.
My way will be of service to some people and not others. Your way will be of service to some people and not others.
Yet together our individual processes of f*cking up and learning provides others a broader range of experiences to relate to.
It would be a damn shame if you NEVER f*cked up in your life and lived to tell others about it.
The world would have a huge hole in it if you never f*cked up in the unique way that only you could have f*cked up.
There is a special light that you carry in all your glorious f*cked-up-ness that will serve the world.
So if you need to hear it again, it's okay to f*ck up.
Learn from it. Forgive yourself. Cry, weep, shout, yell.
Then get back up.
It's all going to be okay.
This is how you become refined.